Monday, April 28, 2008


I am not sure if this is possible, but...When I drink coffee, I feel like I am high. Like... I hit a bong high. Wait. That's wrong. I guess it's almost opposite, except for the emotion. I am in a great mood, and I can't stop moving! I don't even get hungry, I don't even think about eating. I am much less irritable.

Today was a horrible day at After School. The kids were little kid devils... blood was shed, literally. And I just went about my dad like it was any normal, but long, day. 4 different children ended up crying. No wait. 5. A 6 year old swore. (It was the D word!) A darling little girl face planted and ended up with a bloody nose and later had an accident in her pants. A different 6 year old threw a fit (and a garbage can) about not winning in a game. sigh. I had a great time though. We all made puzzles and I participated in tag in the gym. I seriously felt like I was 8 years old. I was running a squealing and I was falling to the floor in knee slides with the best of them. But it hurt. Don't get me wrong. I don't recommend it, but it is necessary to keeping up with kindergardeners. God bless you, Iced Vanilla Latte from Barriques. Without you, children may have perished.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Run Log

For my own sake more than yours, I am going to keep a running log on here, to track my progress through my "First Steps to 5K" class. I understand that I am out of shape, and that all of you could probably run further, faster and with more grace. I know this, but I am working on it.

Week 1:
Wednesday 4/23 - first group run, warm and sunny outside, ran 1 mile in 11:30
Thursday 4/24 - Ran alone, raining, cold. 1 mile in 11:50
Saturday 4/25 - Missed am group run, ran alone, sunny and cool, windy. 1.5 miles in 17:39

More Believable

So... I didn't sleep very much last night, and therefore I am not running as I type this. Sigh.

Friday, April 25, 2008


I have to be up and running (literally!) at 7:30am tomorrow. sigh. Sleep must come now.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Reality settles in

On the plane ride home, I was a basket case. I had to put songs on my ipod which were sure to make me upset when I listened to them on the way home. One that really got me was "Farewell" by Rosie Thomas. Another was "Happy" by Jenny Lewis & the Watson Twins. It wasn't so much the lyric (I couldn't hardly understand them, really) It was more the meanings I gave them. Then I heard "Someday You will be Loved" by Death Cab for Cutie. I really like this song, its so hopeful. None of this alleviated my ridiculous bawling beside the middle aged man from northern Arkansas.

I was sad because I was leaving one of my best friends, whom I don't know when I will see again. It might be a long time. I was also leaving an animal friend, and they hold a special place in my heart. Probably because I have never known unconditional love with another person. After being sad, I got pissed off. Why do people we care about live all over the place? When will they all be together again, and damn it! Why don't we recognize how awesome we have it until its gone?!

Anyway, I was feeling the same way tonight. I am missing my friends who are scattered about this big stupid country. Best wishes to all of you, I hope you are doing well.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Free Ride

Saturday was by far the best weather day we had while I was in Seattle. It ended up being 82 degrees and sunny. Yes. The sun was present in the city of Seattle, Washington. It was glorious day. And then I left the house. As soon as I got out of the car, I decided I needed to go to an ATM. Being the, *ahem*, dumbass that I am, I forgot, yes FORGOT to take my debit card out of the machine. Typical really. Luckily it was the kind of machine that sucks your card back in so that nobody can swipe it. I didn't notice it was gone until 2 or 3 hours later. In the mean time, I spent $45 at Sephora on bronzer and a brush, got blisters on my heels and went up the Space Needle. I had to pee in the space needle and of course the line was long. Now, some of you know about how I can get purturbed at slow bathroom users when the utilities are obviously in high demand. See: contest at outdoor festival port a potties and timed peeing contest between friends. So I was hurrying. Yes. sigh. I wanted to impress the person behind me by peeing faster than he had ever experienced. I want people to like me and I will use any tools I possess. In the process of speed peeing, I neglected to retrieve my Sephora bag from the hook on the back of the bathroom door. I didn't notice that this was missing for about 90 minutes. After the discovery, I was able to finagle a free ride back up the Space Needle to retrieve said bag, only to have to wait in line AGAIN, and then not find it. I come back down and leave name and number with a service station, where P pulls her sephora bag out of her purse to show the worker, when, the lady behind us in line exclaims, "Hey! I saw a bag JUST like that upstairs in the bathroom, about 20 minutes ago!" I look at her in disbelief. I was just up there 10 minutes ago. If I only would have remembered sooner, I would be all bronzed and Brazilian looking, and probably hanging off of my new hot boyfriends muscley arm.

And, this, my friends, is the story of my life.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

The Maddy Roo

When I first saw Maddy, she was tearing out of the front door to greet me with as many loud barks as possible. She growled, she barked, she sniffed. She took the treat I brought. She barked some more. We moved on to go in the house. FINALLY, when we were all crowded on the small front porch, she got enough of a wiff of me to remember... And remember she did. She wiggled, she wagged, she wined. And yes. She peed. And the choirs sang. I almost cried. From then on, our relationship carried on like I was never missing in her life. The last night she even slept with me, curled up and snuggled against my belly. Needless to say, I was a very happy camper.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

One Story at a time

As I sit here thinking about where to start, dipping ginger cookies in market spice tea, I am realizing that this trip deserves more than one post. So you will get snippets, my friends, until the whole story is told.

I tried sushi for the first time, on the first night in town. I think that spending 12 hours traveling on 3 hours of sleep wore me down enough that I couldn't hold any feelings of fear or disgust, so I just did it. (maybe there is something in this.... I should stay up for days before skydiving) The bad news about waiting to try sushi in Seattle means that I am forever ruined for having sushi anywhere else. I have heard it's top notch. It all tasted pretty good, but I liked the spicy roll the best - I don't remember what it was... Urn? I had salmon, tuna, oysters and eel! We also had some deep fried veggies. I can't remember what anything was called because I was half asleep at that point. Sake... not my thing. Patsy and Brian's friend Shawn (or Sean? I don't know how to spell his name, someone correct me) is somewhat of a refined sushi diner so he ordered for all of us. I was super grateful. Finally got to try miso soup (misosoupfourseaweedsaladthreesoyburgers...) as an appetizer and thought it rocked.

Warning: Many of these posts will give the impression that all we did while I was there was EAT, eat, EAT! And that's mostly because eating was a central theme. We did it often, and often paid for it. You'll see. Want pictures? Wait no more

Saturday, April 12, 2008


Dear Readers and Friends,
Sorry for not being completely consistent about updating. I happen to be a long way away, in a far off land. And it is awesome. Get excited for pictures when I get back. They will be here.


Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Not a letter

These are the things I have noticed today, whilst travelling across the country by myself.
  • 3 o'clock is an UNGODLY hour to start driving. Now I know why people say it is 'painfully early'. Cause it actually hurts
  • Driving after 2 hours of sleep is scary. I kept forgetting where I was going, or where I was.
  • When I am tired, I am very blunt. I have absolutely no ability to be both blunt and polite. I only know how to be both blunt and rude, so thats what I am today.
  • Why would they want me to turn my iPod off while we are taking off and landing? Screw that. I left it on. Cause I break aaaaalllll the rules.
  • Being online at the airport is expen$ive.
  • I am a freaking crybaby. Tell me something happy, or sad, and watch the show.
  • Lots of people pick their noses. Look around.

Ok, I have two minutes left before I am kicked off of here. Guess I better go catch a superlateplane to Portland, OR. Then, its SEATTLE TIME BABY!

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Ahh Little kids

This is a letter to my dear friend Johnny*, age 6

Dear Johnny,
Today, you were great! The way that you spent a whole hour writing a three page book! So creative, forget that I had to either spell or hint for you to spell every word. Who cares if it opens backwards and you read the right hand side page first. Also, you were just freaking cute.

Thanks for being awesome,
Jen the after school teacher

P.S. Saying that I am your favorite and that you will miss me while I am gone definitely earned you bonus points.

*Fake name, this kid has a WAY cuter name in real life

Johnny's book, pretty much verbatim:

Once there was a girl who wanted to be a sailor when she grew up. But when she grew up, she was a robber. And she stole a sailors cap. She was put in jail for 3 years. But in 1 + half years, she escaped, but the police almost got her. The end.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Vertical Day

S Sun warmed day
U Unhappy about being fitted for a dress
N New Beer Found! (Raspberry Tart)
D Drove to New Glarus
A Already dreading tomorrow
Y Yellow is still ugly

Hey. I never called myself a poet. Deal.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Love Gods

Dear Love Gods,

I know I pissed you off sometime in my childhood to cause this great love drought. For whatever I did, I apologize. I won't do it again? Sometime in the near future, do you think you could end this reprieve and send me some of your special love rain? I'm parched.

Thank you,
Desert-ed by Love

Friday, April 4, 2008

When I was three hours younger

Dear Jen,

First off, be more specific when you tell your 'blind date' to meet you. Precisely which stairs in front of the union? Oh no! Don't finish all of your food! Stop complaining about dumb things! Pay less attention to him when he starts to criticize normal, everyday things. Try harder to make it less of a big deal when he doesn't have cash to pay for the meal, it really doesn't matter. Even though he said he was going to pay you back after the ATM, don't count on it. Remember that you can't take that beer out of the Ratskeller BEFORE you buy it so that you don't end up chugging it on the second floor. Dance, have fun. Don't be disappointed when the date ends before 10pm. Remember, you have to work tomorrow.

Future Jen

Thursday, April 3, 2008

Goin through the big D and don't mean Dallas!

And I don't mean Divorce either. Today, D is for DATE!

That's right, my faithful readers, this girl has a date for Friday night. Dinner, Drinks and Dancing. Today is really a D day isn't it?! I am so excited, but still I am keeping my expectations in check.

Thanks Friends!

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

April Begins

To start off the month of LETTERS:

Dear Unruly Students from Today,

First off, would you please shut up and listen to me for once?! Don't you see that things would get done with more quickly and you would have more playtime if I didn't have to ask you to be quiet and pay attention and WAIT forEVER for you?

Secondly, YES YOU HAVE TO! (in response to the perpetual 'do I have to?')

Finally, I would like to apologize for having very little or no sympathy for your crying selves this afternoon. Maybe I should feel bad when you break the rules and end up crying on the floor. The whole point of these rules is to prevent that from happening, but you throw caution (and my nerves) out the window and try your luck without rules. I told you so.

Love, your frazzled afterschool teacher.