Friday, March 28, 2008
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Getting excited about the coming days. Tomorrow I am going to a yoga class that is held in the basement of my church. I have heard good things about the instructor, so i will check it out. I could use all the exercise I can find. And free? Yes please.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
I was accepted to the Midwest Teacher Training Program! I will be there from July 14th through August 15th, after which, I have no idea where I will be. That could be where my anxiety is coming from. Now that I know what I will be doing in my very near future, I don't know where I will be after that. And people keep reminding me, asking me where I want to go. I don't know! I won't know until August! Anyway.
Match.com has finally found my credit card. sigh. I already canceled, so I've got 20 days to find the love of my life, goddamnit.
Rewind my life to Sunday morning. I found myself sitting in a choir robe and giving out chocolates in front of the congregation. I actually had a little reflective moment during the service. How in the world did I go from not stepping in a church for almost a year to this in only three months?! I have no idea. But, I do know that belonging to something is really great. (cue Cheers theme song) Knowing that people know you and are counting on you is a big motivation.
As is just being a part of something bigger than yourself. And sure, I guess I mean God and religion, but also just some sort organization. It makes me feel needed and important. But rushing into this whole thing has made me feel kind of phony.
I also feel fat and ugly, but that's beside the point.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Today was Maundy Thursday. This, from what I gathered from the service without asking direct questions, marks the anniversary of the Last Supper. We sang, and it was glorious. Not that we were amazing sounding, but I got into that zone.... I actually looked up and made eye contact and really just enjoyed singing. The chords resonated in my head, and I was lost in the music. It was kind of a shocker to hear it end and have it be absolutely silent. You don't really applaud church choirs, so that is a little different.
Anyway, its late, must watch six feet and sleep. Love to all.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Thursday, March 13, 2008
You, unfortunate souls will have to keep up your 'good writing' otherwise people will be let down. ha ha. I mean, it's not funny. I feel for you. *snicker*
Monday, March 10, 2008
So….I have turned in my application to the Madison Teacher Training Program, payed the $200, written the two essays, and submitted them. The ball is rolling toward my living abroad sometime later in the year. Unfortunately, I have had these feelings that I am making this decision too quickly, or that it is too big of a move to make. I am actually worried that good things might happen that will make me want to stay here. What if I finally get into a good relationship with a guy? What if I get too attached to my church (it could happen, I get attached to many, many things.) What if I am offered a job that I would have to turn down to use the opportunity I will have worked and paid for?
I can't live my life hoping that something will come up and make me happy where I am though, so I am just going to keep moving this forward. I want to Jump.
Anyway, that's my story about Mario. We will see how this develops, unless it has already reached it's peak. I will keep you in the loop.
Friday, March 7, 2008
Sunday, March 2, 2008
I ran today. And it was challenging in more ways that one. First, I haven't been running since probably October or November, so my body was like... wait a min, you want to do what?! Oh, that. Maybe, we'll see. And because it's March, in Wisconsin, the sidewalks were a lovely mixture of ice and water. Sometimes a combination of both (or either in an extreme fashion) was bad enough for me to have to turn around and backtrack, find an alternate route around or walk slowly through it.
Church went well. I was invited to join the choir. This makes me excited and embarrassed. I am afraid people will go, 'hey, why's that new girl up in the choir already?' or, to maintain consistency in what I assume people are thinking about me, 'who does she think she is?'. That might sound stupid, but I don't want it to seem like I am jumping in and should be... allowed(?) to do all the things that the people who have been there forever are doing. Oh, whatever. I know I am over-thinking it. The choir has more men than women, and only one soprano. I was practically begged by the director (who is maybe two years older than me) to join them next Sunday, just because of my sex and voice part. I hope I can still sing soprano. Wouldn't that be the pitts? Oh, I probably can, I just need a little vocal stretching.
Overall, a productive, positive day. Go me.